After spending your entire day taking care of everyone else, don’t forget about you! As mothers we are care takers. We do it all! If we do not complete most things they will not get done. While you’re out grocery shopping, running errands, taking the children to appointments, or even doing laundry ask yourself.. when was the last time i did something for myself?
Self care should not be looked at as self indulgence. For me, self care is a healthy practice and an act of survival. Never let anyone make you feel as though you are being selfish for caring about your own well being. Here’s a list of things you can do to practice self care.
- Goals – Set a couple goals you will like to see yourself complete in a timely manner.
- Music – Turn on some music that speaks to your entire soul! (Jhene Aiko is my personal favorite)
- Rest – When your mind, body and soul is well rested you will instantly be put into a good mental place.
- Pamper – Go out to the Spa, Nail Salon, Wax bar or Hair Dresser. (Spring Rae Studio, IYKYK)
- Shopping – Go to the mall and buy a new pair of shoes or take that trip to Home Goods and buy all the unnecessary items you know you don’t need.
- Breathe – Just stop everything you’re doing and inhale, exhale.
- Journal- Write everything down that comes to your mind.
- Sweat – Go for a run or even to the gym and break a nice sweat! (If you need a fitness instructor Golden Core Wellness is the best)
- Forgiveness – Have you ever noticed when someone isn’t on your good side, any and everything they do will annoy the living hell out of you? That is called control. Forgive them and let that hurt go boo! Also learn to forgive yourself. Everyone has made mistakes or has done things they aren’t proud of. Don’t beat yourself up about it.
- Socialize – Talk to your girls! Come to my blog and TALK! You will be surprised to know how many women are going through the same things. There is so much we can all relate to. LET’S TALK ABOUT IT SIS!
I challenge everyone reading this blog to practice self care this week! After its done, lets talk about it! Lets talk about how good it made you feel and how often you should practice healing yourself. Although with the pandemic we’re in, it may be impossible to get out and do anything but there is also more than enough ways to practice self care at home.
- SAY NO
- Set Boundaries
- Put Yourself First
- Take A Step Back
- Take a long bath or shower
- Spring Clean Your Home
- Focus on Your Growth
To be a good parent, you need to take care of yourself so that you can have the physical and emotional energy to take care of your family. – Michelle Obama
From the moment you met your pride and joy you should have known this was not going to be a walk in the park! We know humans do not come with a manual or a set of instructions; so, from that moment on we figure it out! Once the baby is here a mother is on the clock 24 hours 7 days a week. We do not get sick days, vacation days or any free time. Yes, someone can take your kid for an hour or two.. maybe even spend the night, but the whole time your child is out of your sight you’re thinking of them and constantly checking on them.
After delivering your precious human the typical workplace gives us 6-12 UNPAID weeks off; calling it maternity leave. If you have sick time and paid time off that’s a plus, but after being pregnant for 40 weeks you dig into that time for appointments and simply just not feeling well. Some people have to rush right back to work because they may not be able to afford bills without any income. Once your maternity leave is over, you’re back at work, working 8+ hours a day. Then you have to go home to your baby and still work. By the time you make dinner, give your baby a bath, put the baby to sleep then finally shower (because 9 times out of 10 you can’t do that while the baby is awake) the whole day is over. Point being, it is impossible to be a full-time mother while working full time. Most women will say “I’ve done it, it’s not hard” but ask those same women if they were present when their child first clapped, crawled, walked, said their first words, danced or even stood up alone for the first time; their answer may be no.
As a first-time parent I do not want to miss any of those moments. Humans are here on borrowed time so all we have to hold on to is memories. Going back to work for me at 12 weeks did not sit well with me. Every chance I had I Facetimed my daughter’s dad to see her. Then I thought to myself 12 weeks was not enough time, I needed to bond with my child. After being at work for three weeks i decided to give my notice. It was the best thing I’ve ever done in my life. I have been stress free, well rested, and more connected to my daughter than ever. Every day we get to eat breakfast together, read a book, eat lunch, play with her toys, take a nap, eat dinner, take a bath and watch “Martin” until she falls asleep.
A mothers jobs is never done there is always something to do. Even if dads are involved, they just can’t do it like mom can! But that’s a whole
different story. Mothers are nurturing, it’s just something we have in us that 90% men just don’t have. Women have to come together and be there mentally for one another and also try the best we can to educate future mothers because this mom lifestyle is no walk in the park. Signed – A Full-Time Mama